The other night I met up with a group of girls at a finer restaurant to celebrate the birthday of a dear friend. I was invited by ANOTHER of her friends (don’t worry if you aren’t keeping this all straight; it’s really quite unimportant.) and we all gathered between 7:30 and 8:00 at the gigantic table that was set aside especially for us.
Seeing that the event was scheduled for 7:30, I was not sure if it was a dinner party or a dessert party or a drinks and appetizers party or all of the above. And because I live the life of an old person and there are nights when I’m in bed at the time this party started, I decided to go ahead and enjoy dinner with my family before I left. (Really, the truth is, they were having cheesesteaks and I cannot turn down a cheesesteak because I have no self control, and I am a glutton, and have I mentioned that my clothes don’t fit very well at the moment? Perhaps this is why.) But any-WHO.
So we all gathered and ordered drinks as we waited for the latecomers to grace us with their presence, and then the waiter began going around the table taking orders.
OH! I meant to tell you — the restaurant was practically empty. There were as many empty tables as there were full ones. Keep that in mind; we will come back to that.
So. When it was my turn to order, I ordered a salad. I figured after clogging my arteries and my pores with a greasy cheesesteak, and because the waistband of my pants was already being tested for durability due to my expanding girth, a salad was probably a better choice than the chocolate lava cake that was calling to me from within the pages of the menu.
A few of the other women joined the ranks of The Housewife and ordered a salad, and some split a small entree. Some ordered nothing but a drink. We chatted and cackled like a group of women just released from the bonds of small, nagging children is wont to do, and soon our food came.
The waiter was attentive and polite, and all was going along JUST SWIMMINGLY when the manager came over to the table. He stood right at the head of the table (near where I was unfortunately sitting) and started to explain in an overly polite way that he was more than happy to serve us this evening and get us ANYthing we may want, but we should know, IN THE FUTURE (ha! that is presumptuous, Mr. High-And-Mighty-Manager) that if we make reservations to be seated in the dining room, we are required to order entrees. He reiterated about 30 times that he was MORE than HAPPY to accommodate us THIS evening, but FOR THE FUTURE, we should know that we are not welcome to sit in the dining room without purchasing individual entrees.
Those of us who could hear him smiled icily and nodded, eager to get back to our conversation and illegal salads, while the rest of the table chattered on in blissful oblivion. Then the birthday girl, herself, who is never at a loss for words (a skill that I covet) looked up and said playfully, “Awww, come on! It’s my birthday!”
The manager, looking like he might be regretting his decision to explain his precious entree policy, eagerly assured her for the third or thirtieth time that he would be MORE THAN HAPPY to take care of us tonight.
To which the birthday girl stated in a tone that meant business, “I should hope so.”
Oh how I envy the ability to think on my feet like that.
At that, conversation around the table resumed as the manager skulked off, and his ill-timed speech became the object of our discussion, as we looked around at the empty tables and assessed the situation.
I do understand that this is not an unusual policy, but it seems to me that IF a restaurant is going to uphold such a policy, they would let people know WHEN they make their reservations and not wait until they are all seated and enjoying their food and conversation and then interrupt it to make such a pronouncement. And also. How would a person planning a party even KNOW what everyone else is going to order? There were 10 or 12 of us present; how can you force 10 or 12 people to order an entree when you invite them out for a birthday party!?
We were steamed. The whole thing, in my opinion, was handled very poorly. At the VERY least, he could have made his pronouncement AFTER we were done eating and on our way out the door. Or how about this? How about he just let a few girls enjoy a night out without putting a damper on their evening?
The good news is — that lava cake? Wasn’t nearly as enticing after that little spiel. My waistband is thanking him.
Photo by *spud*
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Ugh, that’s so annoying.
Hopefully, for future dinner parties, there are other places around to eat at. I myself would not be able to take myself back there. Not even for the chocolate lava cake.
Yeah, I see it from both sides.
Not ordering entrees keeps the bill low and thus revenue for a large table stays low and the waiter, who is putting in just as much work, gets a lower tip.
BUT, I totally see if from your point of view about the timing of his little speech. There are better ways to handle such a situation. He acted probably based on what his waiter told him about the table and concerns about tip without thinking the whole thing through.
That’s too bad. I really do hate having to pull my business from someplace because of one silly thing, but that’s the beauty of a free market economy… we can (as I was explaining to my daughter today).
Donna
PS I do love you’re new look here. VERY cute.
Seriously, what did he hope to accomplish with that little act of his? Were you all supposed to scramble and order entrees to soothe his ruffled feathers.
I am the type person who would smile ever so sweetly, stand up, walk up to him, take his arm like a debutante, and ask him to show me were the sign is posted that states patrons must order an entree in order to enjoy the fineness of such an establishment.
I think I’m dangerous at times.
The only thing he has appeared to achieve is ensuring you all DO NOT return, ever!
A very foolish thing to do.
If that fellow had good sense, he would have realized that his little speech was going to do nothing more than ensure that no one at your table ever returned to that restaurant. Not exactly the result he was going for.
Kimba
I didn’t know if I should laugh or cry! Your story just reminded me of how easy it is for me to “speak what is on my mind”. Usually, I realize to late, that I should have just kept my mouth shut.
OMG!!! I was a waitress for 15 yrs, and opened and managed several restaurants. Never have I seen a manager treat a guest like this. If that is their policy, surely they would inform the person who made the reservations at the time the reservations were made?
What the manager didn’t realize was that he didn’t just run off 10-12 people, but many, many more, when friends of those 10-12 hear about it.
I’m sorry you’re experience wasn’t great, but GO YOU! for getting some time out of the house with friends!
Not a smart manager. Hasn’t he heard there is a recession going on? He’s lucky you all were eating out in the first place!
dumb move, manager!!
that was incredibly rude. personally, i would not go back!
Miss Hope,comment number 3, can you give lessons on how to be dangerous like you? The experience would have almost ruined my evening. I worked in restaurants for many years, and would never think to treat a guest that way.
That’s really unbelievable. I can’t fathom any restaurant ever, but esp in this economy, having a policy in place telling anyone what they can or can’t order. What about someone with dietary restrictions? I have truly never heard of that. Now, maybe that says something about about the establishments I DO frequent. ahem.
but gracious! You’d think they’d have been grateful that they had 10-12 people at a table ordering anything at all? Esp since as you say, the dining room was half empty. It’s not like you were taking up space that might have been filled with people spending more $$. I can’t imagine being confronted in the middle of a meal like that. It would warrant a formal written complaint to a higher up that’s for sure and a guarantee of not getting any future business from me.
I hope I am not repeating, I don’t have time to read the comments right now but I will be back…I just want to say -I see his point, but in “these economic times” he should be happy to have people in his rest.
I always seem to be at a loss in understanding rude and/or stupid people. They are everywhere! I just don’t get it. What or who in their lives made it appear that things like this would be acceptable? And good for you for avoiding the lava cake… I myself indulged in my FIL’s b-day cake and ice cream this evening!
I hate managers like that. Working in food service is not always a fun job, but people like that make it worse. The poor waiter was probably as embarassed as anyone else.
So glad your friend wasn’t afraid to use the words needed.
I think you were being far too kind in not “outing” the restaurant by name here on Musings.
What a jerk.
My reply? “We completely understand. You won’t have any problem with us in the future.”
What a terrible business decision he made.
My first reaction is to say – Are you freaking kidding me? (Oh, sorry. I hope it’t not too rude that I just said “freaking” on your blog. But really.) My second reaction is to wonder if this restaurant is feeling the pinch of our current economy and the manager’s rudeness was a result of that stress. But even with that in mind, still – SO RUDE. And stupid, too. Because rather than losing the fraction of money you would have spent on an entree, he just lost any future business!!
What on earth restaurant would do that in a recession? And quite honestly, who would do that at all unless they did it BEFORE you came in.
My friends and I often go out to a restaurant and just have dessert or hor douvres or just a drink.
I haven’t taken the time to read all the comments, so I do hope I’m not repeating anything that has already been said. While I can see both sides of the situation, I’m trying to figure out what the manager was trying to accomplish with his speech? Anyone who works in customer service would know that is exactly how you are NOT to act. So that night he had 12 people who order lightly,BUT had he not said what he said, those 12 people would have remember the ambience of a great evening and probably returned for a three course meal WITH more friends and family.
Now… he just succeeded in losing out on future revenue.
Sad.
Oh, poor manager. He obviously is not a woman. Not only by the fact that “he” is a HE, but also since he doesn’t understand that women make the meal decisions. And his understanding of “in the future”- like you said, was very presumptuous. What a jerk.
I’ve had a restaurant ask a large table of us (similar yakking moms released from the bondage of throw up and legos) to LEAVE because they needed to seat other people. Apparently they didn’t want us to buy anymore overpriced drinks and we were perfectly happy with that.
I’m sure their tables might be more and more scarce soon!
I totally get this! I planned an engagement dinner for a friend and invited only the bridal party. Well…then of course you have to invite their spouses…so basically I had to find a restaurant that would accommodate 22 people. SO DIFFICULT! Trying to work out how to deal with the tab almost send me over the edge! Thankfully, the trusty Japanese restaurant took us in and was totally awesome! It seems like restaurants are afraid of such large crowds…but isn’t it good for business?
“Illegal salads”… Too funny. Glad the ordeal at least took your mind off the Lava cake!
LOL! I would have looked around at all the empty tables and said, “Yes, I can see how we might be keeping those beating down your door from sitting and ordering your precious entries!” LOL. How rude of him. Like you said he could have waited till the end. But really it was the person who received the reservation at the restaurant to clue in the person making the reservations. The manager should have talked to his OWN employee!
Funny story none the less! Thanks
Honestly, with the way things are these days, I have friends in the restaurant business who are happy people order ANYTHING. Seriously. They don’t mind when people split and they certainly don’t mind if people come out just for dessert. This restaurant will be on it’s knees in a few months and they’ll be begging for your salad ordering, entree splitting group.
That’s unbelIEVable. Please tell me you’re not going back. That was very poor taste in my opinion.
wow.. that is awful. I am with you if it really was that big of a deal they could have just mentioned it as you all were leaving. Or when the reservation was made.. Glad you looked at the upside
Unreal!! Like others said, not only did he insure that most of you probably wont be back, but it’s not like to were taking up valuable space in a full resteraunt.
Reminds me of recently I went out with a large group of about 12 – our food took FOREVER to come (we had 2 waiters for our table) food finally arrives, and shortly after the waiters come over with our checks informing us “Our shift is over and we can’t leave until you pay your bill” OMG! – we hadn’t even finished eating, and several still wanted dessert!! – we later notified the resteraunt and received vouchers to come back.
~TidyMom
YIKES – I REALLY should learn to proof my comments before I hit SUBMIT – look at those typos!! ooops!
I was caught up in the moment!
I would send them a letter, explaining exactly why you and your twelve friends will never be returning. What a jerk!
There are plenty (Plenty!) of places out there that would be thrilled to have you.
i can see the stem from the servers ears when hubby and i sit down for a quick lunch on a weekday and he orders soup while i choose a salad (with water)! they pretty much know no big tip here… but really, all we want is soup and salad. plus, it never hurts to be frugal:)
no matter what one orders, in a place of business you would think that everyone would be treated with kindness and respect.
I find that appalling and tacky. And I think I might have stated the name of the restaurant here for all the locals to keep in mind.
Wow! How rude! I totally agree with you. I’m surprised he would even do that. If that happened to me at a restaurant I don’t think I would want to go back there, and I would make sure to let that manager know. If they were half empty isn’t some business better than no business???
I can NOT believe the comments on this post! I honestly thought some restaurant owner was going to come on and give a reasonable explanation for that behavior.
I may write to the MARRIOTT and forward them to this post and tell them to read the comments.
Before I was a mom I worked for several years as a restaurant manager and hostess, and I was equally appauled by your post. The goal at a nicerestautrant should be for the guests to enjoy their food and feel comfortable, and obviously that manager belongs in fast food. Sounds like he’d be better suited to dealing with teenagers at McDonalds than at a nice establishment. A letter is definitely in order, IMO. Any owner worth his/her salt would want to know how their guests are being treated. Keep us posted on this saga!!
Yikes! In today’s economy my general feeling is suck it up. Yesterday you might have been able to set whatever edicts you wanted but today going out for food can require sacrifice. And now they’ve just lost 10 – 12 future patrons. Far more than a $12 entree!
I don’t see the manager’s point of view at all. I tip based on the service, not what I ordered. I wouldn’t go back at all after that. To have a policy like that is ridiculous.
Thanks for listing the business
That name will be kept in mind (to NOT frequent) next time I make reservations somewhere. I don’t frequent businesses that have dumb policies/rude behavior. I can find better places to spend my money.
you would think with the economy forcing more people to eat in at home, the manager would be glad that he didn’t have a totally empty dining room. regardless of the total of your tab, at least any other diners would see a table full of happy party people! to make his pissy little speak in the midst of the festivities is unforgivable. rather than his speech, he should have brought over a nice sized dessert with lots of candles and plenty of extra spoons.
i have a new blog in dire need of a severe spanking/makeover. it looks horrible and my life is boring, but visit me anyway and leave a comment for a chance to win a free ipod!
Wow. What a tool. If there was a wait for tables, I could totally see his point. But advise people when making the reservation or print your policy somewhere. Don’t interrupt a table full of a dozen people who have a dozen families and dozens of friends to make them feel unwelcome – because they will tell everyone and you will lose way more revenue than you might have lost on a table full of salad eating moms. Very poorly handled.
Wow! You would think given the current economy and his half-empty restaurant that any business is better than no business. And now he has 10-12 women who don’t want to return to his restaurant! I think you’ve shown great restraint by not naming the place!
That’s terrible! You should have listed the name of the restaurant so we could all boycott it.
Don’t ya just love false sincerity? Ugh, I hate when service people even use words like that and they mean nothing. It’s so condescending.
I would love to be at the table when Miss Hope (comment #3) does that!
That’s the strangest thing I have ever heard!! I do love your stories though lol
I think he should have either told you when you made the reservation or when you were about to leave…
One word: RUDE
When you sit down in a restaurant, they are privileged that you chose them. They should serve you want YOU WANT – duh! Not what they would LIKE you to eat! – and the table is yours for as long as you like it.
It’s hard to find decent service these days. They want you to shovel down their oversized portions and rush your way out the door, so they can fill your table again. Better to stay home!